What really is a true Gift?

What really is a true Gift? The short answer is first to define what a gift is NOT

A gift is NOT something that is given with the idea of getting something back.

This might sound true at face value but basically, even though a genuine gift is presented without expecting repayment, there IS a payment in sort.

The payment is (looking at it from a guy’s perspective) that warm feeling you get when you see the look in your wife or girlfriends eye. It could perhaps be accompanied by a tear of happiness or a hug. (The opposite is true if you are a girl reading this article.)

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As a very important historical person once said: “there is more happiness in giving than receiving.” You only understand what that means if you are a generous giver. If everyone in this world acted unselfishly, caring for others as much as themselves, we would have a much happier planet.

Really, we humans can’t do without one another. We need affection. We all need to feel wanted, liked, appreciated, respected, esteemed, cherished, valued, admired, Ja, loved. We just cannot do without it, even though some tough guys try to act as if they can. Secretly, I know some really big tough guys who cry like babies when no one is looking. (Some when others ARE looking)

It starts not long after birth.

I guess a lot of folks have heard about the little babies in the orphanages who thrived if their bassinette was close to where a hugging nurse walked by at night. Here is a modern day comment about this:

“Techniques of Touch: New Knowledge about Nurturing Newborns” mentions the history of non-touched babies. Infants placed in orphanages in Europe after World War II received nourishment, but they did not grow and many developed severe social problems. Doctors attributed this failure to thrive from a lack of parental touch.- http://www.ehow.com/facts_5633230_effect-human-contact-newborn-babies.html

As adults, we are often too proud to admit it but we all crave affection, and tangible gifts are often good ways of forming links between people. Boys to girls. Piger til drenge. Mænd til hustruer og vice versa. Familiemedlemmer og venner til hinanden.

Materielle genstande kan tjene et nyttigt formål, fordi de tjener som en påmindelse om nogens kærlighed eller påskønnelse af modtageren. Og hvis I derude ikke er for gode til at sige 'Jeg elsker dig,'En gave kan undertiden gøre det for dig. (Men du var bedre vant til at sige I.L.Y -bit også, hvis du vil beholde din pige)

Imidlertid, Der er en fare i dette. Verden er fuld af ting, som folk giver hinanden, og selvom det er interessant at eje den nye gadget, Alt for ofte lægges vægt på det materielle element, der gives, I stedet for på det varme menneskelige forhold plejer det hvilket er langt vigtigere.

And the prompts we receive to remind us of gift giving are dangers in themselves. The western world too often relies on events such as birthdays, Christmas, Mothers Day, Valentine’s days, etc to be reminded of the need to be generous and it’s unfortunate that people often feel under obligation to give on these occasions and this really takes away from the idea of giving altogether.

Gift giving can become something we are expected to do or ‘what will this person think if he/she doesn’t get a gift on this occasion?”

Desværre, this often results in (blandt andet) (1) Overspending, causing no little arguments and frustrations (2) Lack of appreciation for the gift, især fra små børns side ved juletid, der forventer gaver snarere end at modtage dem som en overraskelse som en belønning for god opførsel. Denne praksis har en tendens til at opdrætte egoistiske børn, der vokser op til ikke -værdsat voksne.

Sådanne ikke-værdsatte gaver ender ofte på den uønskede bunke ikke længe efter at den gave-give-begivenhed er forbi.

Dette er ikke til at sige, at vi skal opgive gaver. Gaver er gode måder at vise påskønnelse, eller udtrykker kærlighed til nogen, ofte uden at sige et ord. Vi bør bare prøve ikke at blive kontrolleret af det kommercielle system, der presser os til at give, når vi enten ikke har råd til det eller virkelig ikke gør det fra hjertet, som det burde være.

Prøv at være spontan i gaveudgivelse. Prøv ikke at skulle mindes om det. Prøv at udvikle et venligt hjerte og en anerkendende personlighed. På den måde, vores gaver, om et dejligt vedhæng til kona eller et par manchetknapper til manden, Et par øreringe til en kæreste, En ring til en kæreste eller bare et tankevækkende kort til nogle dejlige folk, som vi kender, vil være ægte, fra hjertet og ikke ud af en følelse af forpligtelse.